Friday, December 24, 2004
COMMENTARY: Immortal In Music ("Mas Xmas!")
by Don Rose
It was coming for weeks.
Now it's here.
Hear it? Here, there and everywhere?
It was coming for weeks.
Now it's here.
Hear it? Here, there and everywhere?
It's in malls. Halls. Decked with boughs of holly (hint, hint).
Yes, it's CHRISTMAS SONGS.
(Or, if you are one of the politically correct masses: HOLIDAY CLASSICS.)
Yes, it's CHRISTMAS SONGS.
(Or, if you are one of the politically correct masses: HOLIDAY CLASSICS.)
If you want to be immortal, simple. Sing one of these babies.
Or write one.
Your creation will be played constantly.
Every year, forever and ever, evermore, everlasting.
In stores, on shores, you'll be adored -- even in ads -- ad infinitum.
Have a Christmas hit.
Just sell a little bit.
And they will bring you back.
You can be sure of that.
Want proof?
Well... know who Burl Ives is?
He's not had a hit in decades, been forgotten by many --
but one song keeps him comin' back every year.
Like clockwork, his "Have a Holly Jolly Christmas" returns.
Trotted out, dusted off, and played over and over.
Why?
Sure, it's a sweet catchy ditty.
About Christmas.
If it wasn't, would he ever get airplay today?
Compete with Coldplay? Completely cray-zay.
Same thing with Como 'n Crosby.
Coupla cool cooing crooners, cometh back big but once a year.
Of course, "musimmortality" works for other holidays too.
Anything annual will do.
Or write one.
Your creation will be played constantly.
Every year, forever and ever, evermore, everlasting.
In stores, on shores, you'll be adored -- even in ads -- ad infinitum.
Have a Christmas hit.
Just sell a little bit.
And they will bring you back.
You can be sure of that.
Want proof?
Well... know who Burl Ives is?
He's not had a hit in decades, been forgotten by many --
but one song keeps him comin' back every year.
Like clockwork, his "Have a Holly Jolly Christmas" returns.
Trotted out, dusted off, and played over and over.
Why?
Sure, it's a sweet catchy ditty.
About Christmas.
If it wasn't, would he ever get airplay today?
Compete with Coldplay? Completely cray-zay.
Same thing with Como 'n Crosby.
Coupla cool cooing crooners, cometh back big but once a year.
Of course, "musimmortality" works for other holidays too.
Anything annual will do.
Take Bobby Pickett.
Who, you say?
Let me rephrase. Bobby "BORIS" Pickett.
That's right -- the man behind the "Monster Mash".
Trotted out, dusted off, played over and over -- each Halloween.
But nothing matches the aural resurrectorial power of Christmas.
So if you want everlasting fame,
musical royalties up the wazoo,
for you and your kin,
write a catchy -- and, hopefully, moderate-to-high-selling -- holiday ditty.
They, we, will play you forever and ever, for eternity.
You don't even need a catchy title.
Of course, "Christmas Wrapping" (Rapping?) by the Waitresses IS a catchy dual-meaning title.
(By WHO, you say? I think we covered this.
And guess who covered it: yes, the Spice Girls.)
A fun great tune, NPR just did a piece on it,
20+ years of annual replaying, well deserved.
Who, you say?
Let me rephrase. Bobby "BORIS" Pickett.
That's right -- the man behind the "Monster Mash".
Trotted out, dusted off, played over and over -- each Halloween.
But nothing matches the aural resurrectorial power of Christmas.
So if you want everlasting fame,
musical royalties up the wazoo,
for you and your kin,
write a catchy -- and, hopefully, moderate-to-high-selling -- holiday ditty.
They, we, will play you forever and ever, for eternity.
You don't even need a catchy title.
Of course, "Christmas Wrapping" (Rapping?) by the Waitresses IS a catchy dual-meaning title.
(By WHO, you say? I think we covered this.
And guess who covered it: yes, the Spice Girls.)
A fun great tune, NPR just did a piece on it,
20+ years of annual replaying, well deserved.
But Torme-titled "The Christmas Song"? Sounds boring and generic. No matter; Mel knew what he was doing: TCS became one of the most loved Xmas tunes of all time. (Yes, Mel Torme penned it, but ironically his version is hardly played; one of the most covered songs of all time, the most popular pop version is Nat King Cole's.)
"Don", you ask, "does the tune have to be catchy?"
Nope. Just write the dang thing already.
It can be even be odd.
Wacky instead of catchy.
Chipmunks caroling helium-voiced? No problemo -- big hit.
Then there's that duet between David Bowie and Bing Crosby --
you can see it at the Museum of TV and Radio in LA right now, and on the occasional special.
Now, I ask you, would such a pair appear at any other time of year?
Okay, maybe at a benefit for Africa or something involving Bono --
but otherwise, no.
Why the need for all these Christmas songs?
Well, there are all these Christmas radio marathons to fill up
(which used to start maybe a week before Dec 25,
but now seem to start around Labor Day).
Nope. Just write the dang thing already.
It can be even be odd.
Wacky instead of catchy.
Chipmunks caroling helium-voiced? No problemo -- big hit.
Then there's that duet between David Bowie and Bing Crosby --
you can see it at the Museum of TV and Radio in LA right now, and on the occasional special.
Now, I ask you, would such a pair appear at any other time of year?
Okay, maybe at a benefit for Africa or something involving Bono --
but otherwise, no.
Why the need for all these Christmas songs?
Well, there are all these Christmas radio marathons to fill up
(which used to start maybe a week before Dec 25,
but now seem to start around Labor Day).
Want me to recommend more holiday hits? Okay:
The Peanuts "Lucy and Linus" piano instrumental by Vince Guaraldi.
(Excellent tune, and the middle rhythmic change is a bouncy delight.)
Grandma got runover by a Reindeer
(Used to hate it, but it grew on me. Like mold).
Christmas at Ground Zero
(Weird Al jumps on the Xmas gravy train).
Blue Christmas
(Leave it to Elvis to rockify Xmas in a folksy bluesy way).
The Peanuts "Lucy and Linus" piano instrumental by Vince Guaraldi.
(Excellent tune, and the middle rhythmic change is a bouncy delight.)
Grandma got runover by a Reindeer
(Used to hate it, but it grew on me. Like mold).
Christmas at Ground Zero
(Weird Al jumps on the Xmas gravy train).
Blue Christmas
(Leave it to Elvis to rockify Xmas in a folksy bluesy way).
Trivia: do you know the highest selling album of the entire fifties decade?
Right: THE ELVIS CHRISTMAS ALBUM.
Right: THE ELVIS CHRISTMAS ALBUM.
So, the only real question left is:
Why didn't the greatest band of all time, Los BEATLES, ever do an official Christmas album?
Why didn't the greatest band of all time, Los BEATLES, ever do an official Christmas album?
Sure, they did very amusing and fun Xmas messages each year, for fans only (perhaps Apple 'n Capitol will one day remaster and repackage those for mass consumption). But I believe that maybe, just maybe, the Fab Four didn't want to do what everyone else did. Sinatra, Elvis, every huge act always did the Xmas thing. By not doing, this was yet another thing to set the Beatles apart.
Of course, the solo Beatles DID release several Xmas songs. Some were even hits. But then, everyone knows temptation is harder to resist without a group around you. (So go ahead, eat that last piece of turkey, no one is looking!)
And you never know, Beatlemaniacs -- a briefcase full of tossed Xmas treasures might still be sitting in a garage somewhere, a day away from eBay.
Then again, it might just be "Freddie and the Dreamers" doing "Silent Night and other Holiday Classics".
Buyer beware.
Then again, it might just be "Freddie and the Dreamers" doing "Silent Night and other Holiday Classics".
Buyer beware.
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What are your favorite holiday songs?
Write to us.
Just post to this message.
And have a great holiday.
Sunday, December 19, 2004
REVIEW: "BEE GEES: NUMBER ONES" CD
by Don Rose
Forgive me for being rather glib, but I love the Brothers Gibb. I am not alone; The Bee Gees have sold over 100 million albums worldwide, over an astounding FIVE decades (they are the only band I can think of that has had number ones in multiple countries AND during three different decades). If you are like me, you must go out and pick up "Bee Gees: Number Ones". Or go buy one as a holiday present for the Gibbfan in your life. They will not be disappointed.
Forgive me for being rather glib, but I love the Brothers Gibb. I am not alone; The Bee Gees have sold over 100 million albums worldwide, over an astounding FIVE decades (they are the only band I can think of that has had number ones in multiple countries AND during three different decades). If you are like me, you must go out and pick up "Bee Gees: Number Ones". Or go buy one as a holiday present for the Gibbfan in your life. They will not be disappointed.
The songs, of course, are classics and should be part of any pop fan's collection. Also, the sound quality of the CD is fantastic; it felt like the band was giving a private concert in my room. Then there is the convenience: this disc gathers in one place all of the band's number one US singles, some songs that were number ones in other nations, and classics from number one albums. In this sense, the CD is similar in structure to previous all-Number-Ones from other pop giants (The Beatles "1", Elv1s, Michael Jackson's hit collection). However, unlike those other CDs, the limited edition BeeGees NumberOnes CD also comes with a DVD containing five unreleased live tracks -- a nice bonus.
I also admire a band that can still surprise me. On this CD, the pleasant surprise is a pair of early songs I've never heard before: "WORLD" and "DONT FORGET TO REMEMBER". I immediately took to them (the latter feels like a Beegeeified country song).
Of course, the group's Rebirth Period of the 70s is included, represented by "Jive Talkin", "You Should Be Dancing", and..... well, do I really need to mention the megahits from the "Saturday Night Fever" soundtrack? All those smashes are included (from a soundtrack that not only catapulted the band out of their early-70s rock-bottom phase into superstardom, but sold over 30 million copies worldwide to become the best selling soundtrack album of all time). The closer on the "Beegees Numbers Ones" CD is a Gibb Trib -- a song ("Man In The Middle") chosen by the two surviving brothers to pay tribute to the late Maurice Gibb.
Sure, there are many great BeeGee songs the disc does not contain ("Nights On Broadway", "To Love Somebody"), but that is just a testament to how good this band was. You can explore those on other discs, but this is the one disc you really must have if you want the cream of the best UK-Australian band of brothers ever born.
For those new to the music of the Brothers Gibb, this is an excellent introduction. For all Beegees fans who have never had a chance to get all their biggest smashes on one piece of plastic, this CD is a must-have. Sure, the BeeGees' reign atop the pops eventually ended, and punk/new-wave (then hip-hop) took over from disco -- but this disc captures that long-gone golden era of long hair and polyester with loving clarity. (Is it a coincidence that right in the middle of "CBGB's" is "BG"? Perhaps.... but what a ying-yang thang...).
For those new to the music of the Brothers Gibb, this is an excellent introduction. For all Beegees fans who have never had a chance to get all their biggest smashes on one piece of plastic, this CD is a must-have. Sure, the BeeGees' reign atop the pops eventually ended, and punk/new-wave (then hip-hop) took over from disco -- but this disc captures that long-gone golden era of long hair and polyester with loving clarity. (Is it a coincidence that right in the middle of "CBGB's" is "BG"? Perhaps.... but what a ying-yang thang...).
To read more info on the band, see this cool webpage: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bee_Gees
"BEE GEES: NUMBER ONES": the greatest hits of The Brothers Gibb, on one disc; limited edition CD has bonus DVD. The CD track listing:
"Massachusetts"
"World"
"Words"
"I've Gotta Get A Message To You"
"I Started A Joke"
"Don't Forget To Remember"
"Lonely Days"
"How Can You Mend A Broken Heart"
"Jive Talkin'"
"You Should Be Dancing"
"Love So Right"
"How Deep Is Your Love"
"Stayin' Alive"
"Night Fever"
"Too Much Heaven"
"Tragedy"
"Love You Inside Out"
"You Win Again"
"World"
"Words"
"I've Gotta Get A Message To You"
"I Started A Joke"
"Don't Forget To Remember"
"Lonely Days"
"How Can You Mend A Broken Heart"
"Jive Talkin'"
"You Should Be Dancing"
"Love So Right"
"How Deep Is Your Love"
"Stayin' Alive"
"Night Fever"
"Too Much Heaven"
"Tragedy"
"Love You Inside Out"
"You Win Again"
Bonus track:
"Man In The Middle"
NEW TUNE: "Beatles, The Band That Reigned Here"
Here's wishing you the Happiest of Holidays...
plus Best Wishes for the new '05!
And now, a little Beatle poem/song for you
about how the Fabs rose to reign here...
modelled on that red-nosed reindeer.
plus Best Wishes for the new '05!
And now, a little Beatle poem/song for you
about how the Fabs rose to reign here...
modelled on that red-nosed reindeer.
"Beatles, The Band That Reigned Here"
sung to the tune of "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer"
by Don Rose
John Paul and George and Ringo
Had a very shiny sound
And if you ever saw them
You would say they were fame-bound.
All of the record labels
Used to laugh and call them names
They wouldn't let poor Beatles
Join in any contract games.
Then one friendly man appeared
George Martin came to say:
"Beatles, with your wit so bright,
won't you write a hit tonight?"
Then all the fans here loved them,
And they shouted out with glee:
Beatles, the band that reigned here,
You'll go down in history!
Happy Holidays !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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